Candi Johnson has apparently been working hard at art school. She demonstrates her new “skills” in the form of a graffiti Magic Eye picture for her uncle Big Dick Johnson which leaves him confused for a few hours, allowing her to slip away. In the park she is shocked to see Constance making the most of the hot weather by sunbathing nude, and forces her to go to the police station for offending Candi’s eyes. Candi lets slip that she’s dropped out of art school and is terrified of disappointing her Uncle Dick. Constance – spotting an opportunity to have some fun – convinces Candi getting into crime with Uncle Dick would make him proud of her..
Meanwhile, pub landlord Gina Pitts is run off her feet from a rush of clientele and enlists help from the town’s herbalist Debita Webra, with disastrous results. Afterwards, Gina is worried Debita has infected her with ‘hippy’, but later Debita says she hates hippies, is just poor and rather thinks she is a Jedi instead. Bonding over their poor childhoods, the two of them go on a bender and drink the entire stock of Just Gina’s Pub. Candi finds it easier than expected to convince Dick to become a criminal once more – when he finds out the pub is out of booze, he decides to rob Aldi with her. A panicked Gina persuades Debita to provide an alibi for him. The heist goes badly: when Candi admits that she dropped out of art school, Dick sets fire to the supermarket in a rage while Candi locks Debita and a contrite Constance in the pub cellar to cover their tracks. Gina, learning that Dick is in the burning building, rushes off to save him, but is overcome by smoke as the flames grow around her…
Will Gina survive the blaze?
Can Dick forgive himself for returning to a life of crime?
Is this a new opportunity for a rival supermarket in Newtown?
- Big Dick Johnson recalling the long and chequered history of Bertie the Balaclava, which he has stored in his anus for a decade
- Candi, Gina and Dick’s increasingly desperate attempts to fend off the “hippy” Debita, including buying shares in BP, ordering products from Amazon and pretending to slaughter a calf
- Constance deciding to mess with other Newtown residents because she’s “been bored” and “just wanted to have a little bit of fun”